AUDIO WELCOME

You’re the type of woman who is fit, voluptuous, social, talkative, affectionate & loves being adored.   You thrive in your femininity, take pride in your appearance, and you’ve got that rare blend of glamour, sweetness, and ambition.  You want a man who makes you feel safe to lean into your femininity. And, you are feminine, social, and bold enough to match my energy.

I am looking for a partner who has the following qualities:

• Curves: I find breast augmentation attractive. If we hit it off, I have no problem paying for that. I deeply admire women who boldly take control of their appearance in ways that make them feel empowered, expressing themselves artfully feminine, through this enhancement.
• Physique/Body Types: Fit and lean physique.  
• Self-Care: Takes pride in personal appearance, including hair, skin and nails. (If we hit it off, I have no problem paying for that) and prioritizes her mental health
• Put together: Someone who knows who they are and what they want.  And, who has a growth mindset.
• Commitment: Emotionally available, over past relationships and someone who isn't afraid of commitment if it gets to that.
• Primary Love Languages: Physical affection and quality time
• Communication: Open, respectful communicator, Active listener with the ability to ask insightful questions, Has emotional intelligence
• Personality: Talkative, fun-loving, playful, feminine energy
• Social Engagement: Enjoys social activities and is comfortable in various social settings
• Conversation: Capable of engaging in meaningful conversation
• Energies: Capable of being okay with silence, and just enjoying each others presence.  Doesn't always need to have noise in the background or talk.
• Lifestyle: Physically active, enjoys going to the gym
• Conflict Resolution: Handles disagreements through constructive communication

SUMMARY/THE BASICS

• Name: RJ (Everyone knows me as RJ).  I'll let you know what the "RJ" stands for, if we hit it off.  I've never gone by my legal name.
• Nicknames: Dante, Hoby
• Height: 6'1"
• Location: Newport Beach, CA
• Profession: Senior Executive
• Interests: Fitness, socializing, humor, adventure, real estate, construction, mentoring, reading, martial arts, and music (piano/synthesizer)
• Education: Bachelor's Degree
• Political Orientation: Independent thinker
• Religion: Spiritual / Follows the ethics and morals of Christianity
• Physical Attributes: Black hair, brown eyes

6'1" ENTJ Real Estate Exec. Driven, disciplined, competitive. I lead in business, protect what’s mine & provide for my family. I train hard, think independent & live w/passion. Musician & Martial Artist.

I am driven, established, and living life on my own terms, in my masculine energy. I believe in old-school romance with a modern edge: I lead, provide, and protect.  I subscribe to traditional masculinity, emphasizing service, generosity, calmness, gentlemanly behavior, and chivalry.  I move with purpose, I take care of the people I love, I mentor others, and I’ve reached a place in life where I want a partner who doesn’t just complement my lifestyle—but enhances it.

WHAT I OFFER

In a partnership, I commit to:

• Purpose/Direction: I know what I want out of life and the impact I want to make. I'm on it.
• Leadership: Leading with kindness and strength
• Listener: Be an active listener
• Protection: Ensuring the safety and well-being of you and our family(ies)
• Planning: Making and managing plans with consideration for both our needs and desires
• Passion: a zest for life, a growth mindset
• Generosity: I enjoy giving thoughtful gifts and gestures
• Support: Providing unwavering backing and making you a priority
• Emotional Safety: Offering a secure and supportive environment
• Chivalry/Masculine Energy: Protecting and complementing your feminine energy
• Family Values: Placing family and our relationship first
• Flexibility: Supporting your choice to be a stay-at-home wife or pursue a career
• Effort: Demonstrating commitment and resilience
• Affection: Expressing love and appreciation
• Appreciation: Valuing and recognizing your contributions
• Social Engagement: Participating in social activities together
• Personal Development: Maintaining health and fitness together
• Financial Stability: Providing financial security and stability
• Long-Term Vision: Building and ensuring a future for the family and building a real estate portfolio
• Self-Care: I’m happy to cover things like hair and nails to help you feel confident and sexy.

Shared Vision

Together, we can build a partnership where:

• Synergy: The whole is greater than the sum of its parts
• Emotional Connection: We share our deepest thoughts and feelings in a safe space
• Physical Affection: We enjoy a fulfilling physical relationship
• Complementary Energies: Our masculine and feminine energies enhance each other
• Accountability: We support each other's personal growth and goals
• Family Support: We are in a position to care for our parents and family(ies), including generational wealth
• Life Together: We build and live a beautiful, albeit imperfect, life together

Let’s be that power couple everyone notices—but no one can touch. 

COMMUNICATION

I enjoy and appreciate casual texts and phone conversations.  A green flag for me, after the first or second date, is if both parties independently reach out to eachother and check in at least once a day--whether by text or phone call.  Otherwise, we're in red flag territory.

If you're not sure if you're "feeling it" or not, let me know early on and we can work through things together and if it doesn't work out, that's okay.  As far as I am concerned on that front, there shouldn't be any surprises if we don't work out.

MEETING / AVAILABILITY

I prefer to start with a phone conversation, 

followed by a video call, and 

then meet in person, to assess our chemistry. 

So neither of us invest too much, mentally, time-wise, or emotionally, until we know there is in person chemistry.

As a busy executive, I may have limited availability but am committed to making time for the right person.

DISTANCE

Distance is not a concern for me; I am willing to travel for the right connection. 

PACE

When it comes to pace, I believe in moving forward in a way that feels right for both of us. If we ever find ourselves out of sync, that’s okay—we navigate that together. I won’t push beyond what you're comfortable with. If I happen to fall for you first, I’ll hold steady and give you the space to catch up—if you want to—and then I’ll check in with myself to see if I’m still there.

Out of respect for what we could be building, one of my personal guidelines is that I don’t kiss or sleep with someone on the first date. That’s not about holding back—it’s about being intentional.

METRICS

My friends describe me as ambitious, relentless, compassionate.  

Strengths Finders describes me as Command, Ideation, Strategic, Duty, & Responsibility.

DISC profile describes me as Creative, Dominant

Myers Briggs type is ENTJ: (The Commander) Extraversion, Intuition, Thinking, Judging.

My primary Love Languages are physical touch, then quality time, then words of appreciation.

Communication style: Assertive  

Enneagram: 1 (99% match), 3 (89% match), 8 (78% match), 2 (69% match), 4 (64% match), 6 (85% match), 5 (76% match), 7 (63% match), 9 (50% match)

Emotional Intelligence Test (PsychologyToday): 82% (82 out of 100)

Attachment Style: Secure Attachment

E-Colors: Forthcoming

FAMILY

I am divorced with two daughters, aged 9 and 7, who primarily live with their mother. I have them every other weekend.  We co-parent effectively, without issue.

CHILDREN

I am open to 1-2 more kids but with the right person. Otherwise, I am indifferent as I already have two Children.

CAREER

I have over 20 years of experience as a senior executive in my industry, real estate & construction.  I design and build communities from the ground up--turning raw land into neighborhoods where families build their lives. It's high stakes, hands-on, and every inch has my fingerprint on it.

INTERESTS

• Salsa and ballroom dancing
• Playing music (synth/piano)
• Theoretical physics/quantum mechanics
• Working out
• Comedy & Comedy shows, particularly dead pan humor
• Mentoring young adults & fathers
• Deep intellectual conversations
• Martial arts
• Real Estate, construction 
• Cruises and travel
• Music: Jazz, soundtracks, classic rock, instrumental
• Movies: "It's a Wonderful Life,"   "Shawshank Redemption"
• TV Shows: "Billions," "Star Trek," documentaries on history, business, philosophy, psychology, sciences

FAVORITE CONVERSATION TOPICS

• Business
• Real Estate
• Philosophy
• Theoretical physics
• History
• Psychology
• Sociology
• Anthropology
• Politics
• Religion

FAVORITE ACTIVITIES WITH A PARTNER

• Travel
• Indoor skydiving
• Kayaking
• Concerts
• Comedy clubs
• Board games
• Walks and hikes
• Museums
• Movies
• Conversations

FAVORITE PLACES

I have lived in the many Counties of Southern California including LA County, Orange County, San Diego County, and the Inland Empire.  And, I have lived in England in the village of Falmer (attending University of Sussex at Brighton).  And, I have traveled throughout my life.  Below are some of my favorite places:

• Newport Beach, CA
• La Jolla, CA
• Laguna Beach, CA
• Las Vegas, NV
• New York, NY
• London, England
• Brighton, England
• Wine Region, France
• Greek Islands
• Cabo San Lucas

PASSIONS

• My family, friends, mentors, and supporters
• I’m on a mission to "save the world" in my own way—specifically through Education Reform. It’s a big goal, but it’s grounded in something simple: I want my family, our families, to live in a world where the next generation is more prepared and more empowered. I don’t expect anyone to carry that weight with me, but if someone’s in my life, they’ll probably see how much it means to me.

DOES NOT LIKE/PET PEEVES

• Watching sports (If you like to, that's ok. I'll go with you every so often.)
• Seafood (If you like Seafood, that's ok. I'll still go with you to a Seafood restaurant, etc)
• Tardiness (without notification or a practical reason)
• Lack of communication and lack of consistency in communication
• Small talk
• People who don't contribute to build mutually engaging conversations.  Where I am the only one coming up with/asking questions.
• Those who generalize, those who assume
• Not attracted to Smokers

MY QUIRKS

• Sometimes I will look away, and swing away from the focus of eye contact, while explaining something, to focus on collecting/synthesizing concepts and my words most effectively
• I tend to eat dessert first
• I like to color outside of the lines

MY POTENTIAL GROWTH AREAS

• When I’m passionate about a subject, I can sometimes talk at length and dominate the conversation. If that happens, please feel free to interrupt—I value a balanced dialogue.
• I may not respond immediately in the early stages of a conversation, but I always aim to reply within 24 hours. Once we’re dating consistently, you can expect much more consistent and prompt communication.
• I’m a deeply sexual person, but intimacy is about more than just physical connection for me.  Sex is just a part of intimacy.  If I am with you, it is because I want all of you.  If I only wanted a part, I wouldn't be there.  I will always honor your boundaries and treat you with respect.
• I can sometimes be hard to read. If you’re ever unsure about where I stand, please don’t hesitate to ask—I welcome open and honest communication.
• During times of stress or exhaustion, my energy might feel off or disconnected. Rest assured, it’s not about you, and I’ll always make an effort to realign and reconnect.
• I don’t always have the perfect words, but you can count on me to offer emotional support and stand by you no matter the circumstances.
• If I ever fail to meet expectations, just let me know and we'll work it out together.

PAST RELATIONSHIP

My last relationship was about 15 years. Why did my ex and I Divorce? We lost our connection after becoming parents, struggled with mismatched communication, and grew apart as our differences became clearer over time.

MARRIAGE

I’d like to get married again. Realistically—given where I’m at in life—it would probably make sense sometime between 2 to 5 years from now.  Hence, I date with intention.

OFF LIMITS

The only thing off limits is discussing financials.  That we'll save until later.

TRAITS

• No tattoos
• Stoic
• Affectionate
• Sapiosexual
• Ambitious
• Calm under pressure
• Decisive
• Goal-driven
• Competitive
• Efficient
• Effective
• Analytical
• Logical
• Social
• Assertive
• Kind
• Loyal
• Open-minded
• Respectful
• Adventurous
• Passionate
• Romantic
• Giver of the benefit of the doubt
• Believer in chivalry.  I enjoy opening your doors, leading with you in my hand, and more.. as part of my masculinity.

LEGAL FACTS

• I’ve never been arrested, and the last time I got a driving ticket was a “California stop” over 20 years ago.

EFFORT

I’m the kind of man who shows up with purpose. I’ll plan the date, make the reservation, and walk on the street side of the sidewalk. After our first date, you can expect a text or call from me each day—not because I’m needy, but because consistency matters. 

And I expect effort and investment on your end too specifically in initiating conversation too and emotional engagement.

CHEMISTRY

Naturally, chemistry is a key aspect to a romantic relationship.  There's physical chemistry and there's also mental, spiritual, emotional, etc aspects.  While over time chemistry can fade, in one or more of those aspects, the key thing for the long term, at least for me, is that it is at least there in some degree between ALL of those different dimensions.  

There may be passion at the beginning or not, but as long as all of the key dimensions connect, at least to some degree, then it's good from my end.

DATING

I’ve encountered women with serious issues—addictions, legal troubles (trial kind of stuff), lack of stability or ambition, self-absorption—who expected to be pampered without offering anything meaningful in return, and one that strung me along for a month where despite holding hands, remarking about our connection, and committing to eachother, in the end her words and actions were not consistent.

So when I say I do not enjoy dating, it comes from experience.   I can confidently say I have never put a woman though the things I have experienced.

NO GAMES, JUST REAL

I don’t play emotional hide-and-seek. If I like you, I’ll say it.
Not because I expect something in return—but because I respect what I’ve seen in you up to that point.

I know today’s culture says a man should wait, calculate, strategize… or risk looking “needy.”
But I’m not interested in performing.
I’m interested in connection—with depth, honesty, and real chemistry.

You might like me. I might like you. It might be different for both of us.
What matters is that we both show up as we are—no masks, no games, no timelines.

That’s not desperate.
That’s just real.

COMMITMENT

I'm open to commitment, but to me, an ideal partnership means we each maintain our autonomy and individuality. No one is controlling anyone. It's about choosing each other daily—not out of obligation, but genuine desire. I want something real, respectful, and healthy; the kind of relationship that builds each other up.

EMOTIONS/LIKE/LOVE

If I like you, I’ll tell you. I don’t play coy or pretend to be disinterested just to bait you and gain leverage. That’s not strength—it’s manipulation and toxic masculinity in disguise. A real man owns his words, his intent, and his standards. I’ve been around long enough to know what I’m looking for, and if I say something, it’s because I’ve seen enough to mean it. You don’t have to be in the same place right away—but you’ll always know where I stand.

If one of us starts feeling deeper emotions first or we're a bit out of sync—that's perfectly okay. For example, if I fall for you first, or you fall for me first, it’s alright. What truly matters is that we're both here, committed, and continuing to invest in each other, open to eventually reaching the same place together.

As for jealousy, I simply don’t entertain it. Jealousy is a waste of time and energy.  I prefer to trust my partner and focus on what we can control, rather than stressing over hypotheticals.

SEXUALITY
I’m naturally affectionate and value physical intimacy, but I approach it with respect and patience. I prioritize your comfort, honor boundaries, and am always open to adjusting if I come on too strong.

I have had women be disingenuous, touting a strong sex drive competing with mine only to be told later that we were having too much sex.  Please be honest and set realistic expectations, don't just tell me what I want to hear.

MASCULINITY

I subscribe to an old fashioned idea of masculinity, that balances with and supports its feminine counterpart.  

In my humble opinion, a real man:

• Puts service above self
• Takes care of his loved ones, friends
• Is generous
• Is calm, in control of himself
• Is a gentleman
• Imbues chivalry
• Apologizes when he is wrong
• Laughs and gets a kick out of insults intended to provoke him

And, in my humble opinion, a real man:

• Does NOT espouse violence or act violent
• Does NOT lose control of himself
• Does NOT put himself above others
• Does NOT demean nor diminish anyone elses dreams or goals or viewpoint
• Does NOT get provoked

CHILDHOOD

I grew up in Southern California, and for most of my childhood through high school, I was a short, chubby kid with zero sense of style. But in high school, things changed—I found my drive, set goals, and started chasing ambitions. That transformation shaped who I am today and is why I value respect and kindness so deeply.

CONFLICT
I view conflict as a chance for growth and value open, respectful dialogue. I stay calm, welcome feedback, and strive to learn from misunderstandings. I’m looking for a partner who’s equally committed to working through challenges with patience and understanding. So if you disagree or don't like something, just tell me...it doesn't need to be uncomfortable or awkward, just tell me... no biggie.

TRUTH

By now, you probably know that not everything online tells the full truth. Every one of us—especially those who’ve stood firm, made hard choices, or even just been misunderstood—has had someone upset with us all at some point. Sometimes that turns into words on a screen. So if you come across anything negative, please take it with perspective--it may or may not even be factual.  Or it might be from a skewed perspective.  And, I’d rather you get to know me for who I am today, not through the lens of someone else's anger. Feel free to ask me about anything you come across.

A friend of mine had been seeing someone who ghosted him out of no where.  Weeks later she randomly checked in.  She’d seen something online about him and assumed the worst—never asked him about it, just disappeared. Well, turns out, it wasn’t even true. However, by the time she circled back, the connection they had was already gone. 

Misunderstandings are easy when you don’t ask. So if you’re curious or concerned—just ask me. That’s all I ever expect: fairness, not perfection.

HYPOTHETICAL SCENARIOS

Conflict: 

When I’m upset, I address it calmly and respectfully, giving the benefit of the doubt. I believe conflict, handled with kindness and patience, can lead to deeper understanding and a stronger connection.  It might all even be based on a misunderstanding or miscommunication--- in my experience most problems are.

A weekend together:

Our ideal rhythm: start the day making breakfast and supporting each other’s workouts, then spend time with friends or go on fun adventures together. Lunch is light and mindful. Evenings are cozy—TV, reading, or going out. We share cooking and cleaning, enjoy social events or host gatherings, and work side by side during the day when home.

FINAL NOTE

Dating can feel overwhelming and challenging, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and connection. This platform has been a valuable tool for both discovering meaningful introductions and identifying where there may not be alignment—whether it’s with individuals who might be emotionally unavailable, overly negative, or not in a place to foster a positive connection.  

Whether you choose to build something with me or walk away—that choice is now yours, to grow from or regret.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for taking the time to learn a bit about me. I welcome the opportunity to add more dimension and depth to what’s written here and explore whether we have chemistry.